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Hello, and welcome to the Own Your Health podcast, I'm Cyndi Lynne, and I can't wait to help you step into your health power. So studies have shown that people who have strong social circles not only live longer, but report living happier lives.
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So what does it take to build a social circle? I thought it would be helpful to look at the four different types or broad categories of people that you may have in your life that you may not even think about as being your social circle, and also these categories that you may wish to develop if you don't have anyone that is this type of person for you.
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So, first of all, I find it really valuable in terms of how my day feels and how interactions feel to have casual connections with people. The way I interact with people at the grocery store, especially the cashiers that I see over and over again at my favorite stores or the coffee shop.
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Or I had subway friends that I would see day in and day out when I rode the subway, when I lived in Toronto and rode the subway for work every day. And a lot of them, I didn't even actually know their names, but you get to know people, where they work, what they do, and you just kind of see them.
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They're a smile for you. They're part of your social circle. And when they're not there, when somebody's on vacation or you miss them, it's a feeling of loss. It's a connection that's casual, but it's there. It's kind of very validating of the small parts of life.
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Now, in contrast to that, the second type of person is the really deep, meaningful connection. Now, this might be family, but it doesn't necessarily have to be. It might be very close friends, someone who you have years and years of history with, someone who knows all about you and loves you anyways.
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They know the good, the bad, the ugly and you do know that about them as well. And these are people that you can share deep feelings with that you don't have to worry about being judged. You don't have to necessarily always think before you speak.
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You can just speak from the heart if you're having a very emotional time or going through something in life. And these people are absolute treasures because they help hold your history, they help hold space for your life experiences, and they're the people who are there for you and people who you are act in that way for them.
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Now, the other two types, people don't always think about in terms of cultivating in their social circle. The third type is a mentor or leader or teacher. So this could be a pastor or a priest.
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It could be a mentor you have in business. It could be just someone who is more accomplished at a hobby that you're learning or, or trying to improve at. These are people who maybe are excellent cooks and you always enjoy spending time with them and learning a little bit more about cooking.
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And these relationships can become deeper, more personal relationships, but they also have value for just exactly what they are. That focus, that focus of being mentored, of learning from, of being led.
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Because it's important to recognize our own personal need to grow and expand. And so identifying these people who help us do that really makes our social circle rich and inviting.
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And then the fourth that I wanted to touch on is the inverse of that. Mentor, leader, teacher. And that is people for whom you are the teacher or the leader or the mentor. Who do you take under your wing?
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Somebody new at work and you show them the ropes. Somebody new to a hobby that you enjoy. Someone new into town, new moving into your neighborhood. And you're the person who is kind of a resource for them and tells them where to find things or who to call for repairs or where to find services.
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It's important to give these kind of supportive skills and affirmations to people as well, because that allows you to experience that sense of accomplishment and it allows you to give.
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And when you become comfortable with giving, it also helps you be comfortable in receiving in that same way. And a lot of us have trouble with that receiving. So a lot of us, depending on how we were raised and what your background is, don't necessarily want to ask for help or don't necessarily expose your, your weaknesses or your needs to someone who is maybe outside of your family.
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And that's really, that's really cutting life off in so many ways. Because so much of our social circle is not necessarily family. Family is absolutely in our social circle.
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But what we need to be healthy and to grow and to live a full life is so much broader than that. And so to learn, to give a smile on a daily basis and a casual relationship, to be willing to listen and share deeply in a long term, committed relationship.
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As well as being a mentor and leader and taking mentoring, taking teachings from others. These are the four dynamics that I think are the foundation of a really rich social circle that supports you in growth and happiness.
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Now, if you have other people who are in your social circles that you think are important, I'd love to hear about them. Drop a note in the comments below or send me an email. In the meantime, build that social circle for health. And until next week, let's go out and own it.
